There comes a time in every year off when a person starts thinking about the things that were good about the job she left–and starts to miss them. Apparently, for me that day is November 3rd. Well, no, that’s not entirely true–I’ve been missing things since the first day of summer vacation. I’ve just been so busy looking forward that I’ve failed to look back. But truth be told, there are many things that I really miss about my job. Here’s top five, in typical countdown order…
5. Get ready for this one–I miss the kids. I realize that sounds insane–after all, I taught 8th grade. Most people feel that’s like a fate worse than death. But I like (most) 8th graders. As individuals. Do I long to return to a class full of 35 of them and attempt to teach them about prepositions? No. But being around all of that youthful energy keeps a person young (and very often makes you laugh!) Plus–and this is a very real concern–how will I ever know if I’m in style? I don’t read fashion magazines–but middle school kids do. I’m afraid I’m going to end up an 80 year old woman wearing Uggs and leggings the way my nana wears ‘pedal pushers’ and ‘blouses’ (I’m wearing them right now and I’m pretty sure they went out last season!)
4. I miss junk food. While it is probably a good thing (for my waistline) that I don’t have a daily meeting at which eating chocolate is almost required, I do miss it–a lot. Three weeks ago I randomly baked a cake (the day after my husband’s birthday–ooops!) because I was just dying for some sort of baked good. Halfway through mixing up my boxed mix Funfetti cake I realized why–by that point in the school year, surely several people would have had birthdays–and thus, birthday cakes (or, even better, cupcakes!) Even if there’s no reason to celebrate, cupcakes often showed up in the faculty room for one reason or another. By October 10th, I was in sugar withdrawal.
3. I miss having a reason to get dressed up. Yes, it is true that my school was more…ahem…casual than many others but still, one dresses a certain way to teach a class…and a totally other way to sit in her house and type. I’ve not been reduced to day-long bathrobe sessions…yet. But I can see how it could happen.
2. I miss having a reason to leave the house. You should know that this is being typed from a table at Barnes and Noble. Yes, I have internet access at home. And yes, it does technically cost me money to be here (because I insist on buying a cup of tea to justify my presence at a commercial establishment.) But I figured out weeks ago that I’m much more productive when I drive somewhere to work than when I’m sitting at home. Plus, here, there are no dogs barking, no dust bunnies begging to be swiffered–and my dying laptop battery encourages me to actually work (and not just fart around on Facebook. Though writing this doesn’t technically count as work–ooops!)
1. Of course, the number one thing that I miss isn’t one thing–it’s many things. Or, rather, many people. I miss my coworkers! I miss talking through the half-open walls to my pod-mates during my prep period. I miss being interrupted by other grade level teachers in the middle of a class. I miss Friday diner breakfasts and trivia at lunch and–possibly most of all–I miss happy hour! Being given the chance to work on my book and travel is a wonderful thing–but one of the things I gave up to get that is the end-of-the week celebration (or, rather, the idea of ‘the end of the week’, as I work almost every day.) I would love to sit around a bar or a table (or many tables pushed together) and talk to my old coworker friends. I’d probably not have much to say–seeing as I’m now totally out of that loop–but I think I’d honestly just be happy to sit there and listen to the sound of other voices!
And so, as I sit here at the bookstore–not in my bathrobe–I’m thinking about 5th period lunch that’s going on right now. I’m hoping that everyone there is having a good day and that this year’s batch of kids is an enjoyable one. I hope that the underdog trivia team is ahead in points. I hope that there’s a half eaten sheet cake in the middle of the table, both microwaves are working, and the kids are still outside. And I hope that everyone is really looking forward to the weekend. After all, tomorrow is already Friday!
Existential Midlife Twitch 
5. I miss them too, and it is four years later. 4. Weight Watchers 3. I get dressed up anyway. Lately, I am channeling my inner hipness. 2. I go to the Good Will, then I go home. 1. I developed a new set of colleagues in my new business. Plus I stay in touch with others through FB.
I hope you are not having second thoughts. It is an adjustment that really does take at least a year. If you are having an success or enjoyment doing what you are doing now. Just run with it. You have already had, what 8 years of teaching? You also know the downside to that. Give this a chance. A good chance.
Thanks for sharing how you deal with all of the above! And I wouldn’t say that I’m having second thoughts–I’d say that this whole year IS a second thought. I have no idea what I’m going to be doing next calendar year, never mind next school year (side note–it is still very hard to not think of years as starting in September!) We shall see what happens.
Thank you! We miss you too. There was a collective, “aww” at the table when it was read outloud. And thenn we immediately felt the need to include you in soup-making plans. 🙂
Ah yes…I may be gone, but I…er, my cooking…is not forgotten. 😉
Hope you have a great Friday! Happy almost weekend. And hey–this weekend comes with ELECTRICITY!
I completely understand! 4 years ago I left my full time job to come work with my husband full time. It’s just the two of us. I’m in the office 75% of the time by myself as he’s out on installations.
It took me almost a year to get used to spending so much time by myself. I do get phone calls during the day and the odd customer in occasionally, but our foot traffic is very small. I go out on sales appointments a couple of times a week. That’s it.
I missed my coworkers the most. There was none of that Monday morning, what did you do over the weekend, or what did you watch on TV last night. There also is no “what did you do at work today dear”, cause I know what he did.. I was there.
Some things that I did to help that. I go to the YMCA every morning from 7-8:30 to water walk before work. That is very social as most of the people there move their mouths more than their legs! I talk to one friend in particular on Facebook most of the day because she’s in a similar situation as me. I also volunteer. My husband and I belong to several organizations and I am on the board of one of them. In fact i’ll be president next year so that will take up a large amount of time.
I guess what i’m trying to say is I looked for other ways to find people to socialize with. It really helped and now I like my quiet days and actually get a bit grumpy when it gets too busy.
I can see how that adjustment must have been difficult. On the one hand, yes, you do get a tiny bit more social interaction at your business–but you work with your husband! That must be tough–at least I get to hear about my husband’s day at the end of my lonely day! Though he’s a teacher and that’s what I left…so sometimes I DON’T actually want to hear it! Ha!
I was seriously considering joining a gym both because it is getting to cold to walk/run outside and because it would give me somewhere to go–and maybe if I did some of the classes I’d start seeing the same people each week. The volunteering thing is a GREAT idea–but sadly I don’t actually have large amounts of time! Maybe some day–when this book is further along. Or when I decide to stay put for more than two months at a time!
Thanks for sharing your story–it really helps to know that there are others out there in the same situation. And thanks for commenting–even that counts as socialization in my book! (even though it is Saturday, my husband is working–he’s getting paid so I can’t complain–but six days a week?!? Sigh…!)
Since we have our business we often work nights and weekends.. In fact, we have an appt. at 1 tomorrow afternoon since that’s when the client is available! You do what you need to do.
Check out the local Jaycee chapter in your area. It’s a terrific organization and it’s specifically for people 21-40 so they are all around your age. It’s even how my husband & I met!
Aww–how sweet that you two met volunteering! That’s awesome!
I’ll have to check out that organization–I’ve heard of it but I think I never knew what they did…? I had no idea that people my age even DID volunteer–I guess I assumed that most people who had the time were retired. Though I do get along better with people older than me. I always have. My husband says it is an only child thing.
It’s HARD to make new friends at this age (I’m going to be 32 in a couple of months.) Most people my age have young children (or babies…or are pregnant…) and thus don’t have time for any friends–nevermind new ones!
Ok–I just Googled ‘Jaycees’…is it wrong that I think I’m too OLD for such a group? I guess I really DO identify with people (significantly) older than me! 18-40 sounds like a group that I’m almost out of (well, in eight years…)
Well, i’ll be 38 in February and i’m one of the older ones. My DH is 33.. However, we don’t have kids either (can’t and don’t want to adopt) and we find ourselves hanging out with all the people who are single/don’t have kids. We have very little in common with the people who do.
When I first joined, most of the members were in their mid to late 30’s… Now, 6 years later, they’ve aged out and most of the members are in their mid to late 20’s. It’s kind of interesting because they definitely have different perspectives than I do.. But when I want to go out and just have fun, they are the ones to hang out with. I think they look up to us because we are more established, have our business, are debt free, etc.
I actually had someone tell me that we really have our lives together. I just looked at her and said, well, if you knew me 10 years ago, you wouldn’t have said that. Lots has changed in the last 6-7 years..
We do have friends who are older (We also belong to the Moose club, average is like 60). Were joiners like that! When we go there, I feel really young! I would suggest going and checking it out and just seeing what it’s like. It’s not for everyone, but you won’t know till you go.
Ok, I’m done writing my book now!
Wow–it seems like we are the same couple (minus the debt free part–my husband went to two VERY expensive schools…we’ll be paying it off until we are dead!) He’s 38 and I’m (almost) 32 and we can’t have kids either (and the adoption thing is still way up in the air!)
I wish I felt like I had my life together–thought I guess feeling like it is ‘apart’ is a normal side-effect of taking a year off from work. Change often happens through chaos, right?
I do feel MUCH healthier though. So that’s something, right?
No worries about the typos–I often reply to comments using my iPhone. Between auto-correct and my fat thumbs–yeah, I’m familiar with typos! 😉
Please excuse all the typo’s! I’ve got a dog on my lap and another trying to stick his head on top the computer!
Yup, feeling healthier is definitely something to be proud of. I’m trying to work on it and it’s the only part of my life that i’m not happy with. However, I most of the time choose to ignore it and focus on what I am happy about. Not the most effective plan!
I think it’s great that you took a year off work. Most people wouldn’t have the confidence to that, especially with so many out of work already.
We knew we were taking a chance when I gave up my full time job because it was guaranteed money. Having your own business, there is no guarantee. We were really happy that it’s worked out for us and I truly can’t imagine going back to working for someone else!
Hope your enjoying your weekend!